Saturday, January 24, 2009


Now I feel like being alone, living in my wonderful holy world, my fantasy land, my peaceful secret hideout. Less trouble less problem less stress less pain.

Ignore the fact that I am always being left out, not really a big deal though, but when this is happening to a person who hungers for attention, care and love from whoever he knows, yet he has to be one obedient child and a perfect(but not so perfect) son for one protective family, something must be scarifies!

So, basically everything is actually so near yet too far to be reached. It's just like how much I love animals, I can only see it through the glass container or cage but not having one for myself. Same theory.

I understand all this problem will be solved one day, perhaps what I should do is to be patient and wait. Wait for the perfect time perfect hour perfect minute perfect second perfect moment together with the perfect key of freedom to arrive, and by the time the lock will be unlocked, I will get everything I want.

WAIT, is the one and only thing I should do now. Forgive me if I can't be by your side, as I am not fully ready for anything at the moment. I guess I should be left alone for the time being.

Knowing how much you guys trying to "save" me from my "troubles" but somehow "something" within me can't be changed, at least not now. Perhaps I might "open up" myself one day but to be sincere, this is not the time. I mean, I think there is something else in my life that is more important than what I want and need currently, I don't know what is that but I guess I might know it in the future.

For the moment, I am alone.

And I believe I can still live on my very own special and different life!

p.s. Happy Chinese New Year!

2 inner voice(s):

Josephine said...

Gong Hei Fatt Choy!
Be happy!

Florence said...

u r not alone :)
u hv many frens around u..
we cant predict how is the future think + always ba..
sure 1 day u can be FREE!!
& so wish u here.. happy chinese new year ya!^-^~gambateh~*